Desire’ Nesmith – Doula Spotlight

February 26, 2020

Hello! My name is Desiré and I am a doula, childbirth educator and owner of Written in the Stars Birth Services. My husband and I have been married for five years and we have a one and a half-year-old daughter named Calliope, and three dogs, who were our first babies. We moved to Fort Worth, Texas, when my husband was stationed here as a United States Marine and have now planted roots and been here for nearly five years.

When I unexpectedly found out I was pregnant with my daughter, I had no idea what a doula was, or why I needed one; however, I did know that ever since high school (yes, I was that weirdo that was obsessed with birth and babies) I always dreamt of having a water birth. After doing some research about my options, and many conversations with my husband, I decided to switch my prenatal care from an OB/GYN to a midwives group that delivered at a local hospital (and had a birth tub). Per the midwife’s suggestion, I began to look for a childbirth education class and consider investing in a doula. After hiring a Birth Boot Camp Doula and taking the 10-week Comprehensive Birth Class, I was hooked. I went on to have an unmedicated birth, after five days of prodromal labor, and not even realizing that my consistent contractions and nausea were the real deal. All the hard work my husband and I had done throughout my pregnancy truly served its purpose and prepared me for an amazing pregnancy and birth. I was elated. I became interested in doula work following the birth of my daughter when I just couldn’t shake the “birth high.” I loved sharing my birth story with others and offering the knowledge I gained from Birth Boot Camp to help other moms and families make informed decisions about what may be best for them. It was a natural next step for me to pursue certification and begin branching out and helping other moms and families as a birth professional.

My passion is simple: supporting birthing moms, and their carefully chosen birth team, to advocate for what they believe is best for both mom and baby, based on evidence, and not fear-mongering. Also, as a woman of color, I am passionate about supporting minorities, due to the rising maternal death rate among women of color in the United States.

I chose to certify with Birth Boot Camp because I had so recently been a first-time mom myself, searching for doulas on Google, scared of birth and doubting what my body was designed to do. Choosing a Birth Boot Camp doula truly changed the course of my pregnancy and helped prepare me for an amazing birth. When I decided to pursue becoming a doula, it was a no-brainer for me that Birth Boot Camp was where I was meant to be.

My trainer was Amy Anderson and my fellow doula trainee was Claire Francis. For three days, we discussed our own birth stories, best practices as a birth professional, how to support clients with different needs (single moms, victims of abuse, etc.), basics of starting a small business, and challenged our own perceptions about birth and a doula’s role in supporting moms to have the amazing birth they have dreamt of. My favorite part of the training was gaining two amazing friends in the birth community who have since been among my biggest supporters. I’m so thankful for the Birth Boot Camp family.

I love the trust that is at the foundation of my relationships with my clients. Meeting a family for the first time and sharing what a doula does, and answering any questions they may have, turns into a relationship that lasts for the duration of pregnancy, birth and beyond. My favorite part about being a doula is that I am really able to get to know my families on a personal level and support them through one of the most magnificent times of their lives. Every birth is SO different and there’s a level of excitement when you show up at mom’s birth location and see how all of mom’s hard work is helping her birth her baby. I’m blessed to be able to be part of the beautiful process of birth for so many families.

In addition to the relationships I’m able to build with my families, I’m lucky to live in the Dallas-Fort Worth Metroplex, where there is such a robust network of birth workers. I have endless resources who are always willing to share their stories and insight into how to how I can better support moms, babies and the entire family.

The number one question I had as I walked into my training was “What do I have to have in my doula bag?!” After much discussion and going through my trainer’s doula bag, I placed an Amazon order and stocked up my own to be ready for births! My doula bag is now packed full with things like my rebozo, my doula handbook, an extra phone charger (usually for dad), straws (to make it easier on mom to stay hydrated), hair ties, arnica massage oil, quartz stone for massaging, an extra pair of clothes (you never know when you could be splashed with amniotic fluid) and everything else I could ever need when supporting a laboring mom. Practicing with a rebozo during training also helped me feel confident about attending births. We walked through various positions and perfected the ways to use the rebozo for countless scenarios that could arise during labor.

I believe that doulas, childbirth educators, midwives, and other care providers, have the power to truly make a change in the way our society looks at birth. So often, women are expected to allow someone else to plan their birth, and they are not taken seriously when they ask questions or want to take a different approach to their care. Birth is a natural process, that every woman has the right to be informed about. My goal as a doula is to educate as many women as possible and to always remind them that they have options. This your birth, and you should do it your way.

Desire is a doula and instructor serving women in the Dallas/ Fort Worth Metroplex in Texas. You can find her at:
https://www.instagram.com/writteninthestarsbirth/
https://www.facebook.com/WrittenInTheStarsBirth/
https://writteninthestarsbirth.com/ info@writteninthestarsbirth.com 817-369-5835


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